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| Feature Article |
In recent months, there has been some serious light shone on the state of race relations in our great nation. It
appears after thousands of marches, sensitivity trainings and diversity initiatives, America still has a race problem.
Whether perceived or not, the fact that people are lying down in the middle of street speaks to how true diversity is
viewed in our country. No matter what your race, treating others with kindness doesn't require you be born to a
certain culture, just that you be born human. With help and a few simple do's and don't, you can learn to let your
humanity shine around race issues.
Racial etiquette is a set of rules I have observed over the years that I feel should be recognized as we continue to
grow into a diverse nation. Check them out below and try to put them into practice.
Race Etiquette...The Do's and Don'ts
Saying you have a friend of any other culture is offensive
The "proverbial racist" who tries to explain he's not racist because he has "a black friend" is never cool. If you have
to explain you're not racist, you're probably being racially insensitive and maybe borderline racist. Don't refer to
your one "black," friend to prove a point. Simply let your life speak for how you truly feel about those of different
races. Sad things is, in a recent article in NY Magazine, statistics revealed 75% of whites can't even use the "black
friend" defense because frankly, they don't have any black friends.
The "N" word is never appropriate for other races to use
There has never been a more controversial word in the human language than the "N" word. It's deep rooted history
of hate and violence is the reason African Americans hate it when other races use it. There is great debate among
other cultures about using the word like African Americans do, as a term of endearment. I can only liken it to when
growing up with siblings. As a big brother or sister, you can knock the snot out of your sibling, but no one else
better not even think about it. So if polled, approximately 99.9 percent of African Americans if they were honest
would agree, they are offended when other races use the term. Key rule of etiquette is stay away from the "N" word.
Don't use the term "colored" to describe black people
When referring to black people, don't use the word "colored." I know some people may say they are confused
because blacks have gone through a few name changes, but one thing is clear..."colored" is not nor will ever be
acceptable. Now, "people of color" is different. In MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech in 1963, he referred to the
people as, "citizens of color." So with that in mind, when you are referring to a group of people who are of different
races as "people of color," you are using a universal term which is non-offensive. The "ed" in "colored" is what sets
it apart.
Don't use derogatory terms to describe other races of people
Using words like "cracker" and "wet back" are offensive. If you call someone these things, you can expect to be
regarded as a racist. People of all colors use these words, but they are hurtful, offensive and inappropriate. When
describing someone of another race, try start with their name. If you don't know their name, try describing how
you know them like, "my neighbor," or "the dance coach." Begin to re-condition yourself for seeing people for who
they are and not for the color of their skin.
Don't make an assumption based on someone's color
No one wants to be judged by the mistakes of their entire race. If so, everyone would have some explaining to
do.Learn to treat people based on who they are and not what color they are. You can't assume how someone is or
will treat you just based on characters you see on television or read about in the news. Bad people come in all
shapes, sizes and races.
Don't try to fit in to someone's culture by referring to music or language
One day I was in an elevator with two older white distinguished-looking gentlemen. After a few moments of awkward
silence, one turned to me and said, "I like rap music." I didn't ask him if he liked rap, so I can only guess maybe
that's all he knew about black people. For the record, shout out to DRAKE. But, that's not the point. I'm a
grandmother, an author and an American citizen, couldn't we have come together around something other than
"Flava Flav?" Bringing up rap music and trying to talk Spanish when you really can't is very offensive to other
cultures. Just stick to the weather and the playoffs and you should be okay.
Don't ask other races to touch their hair
Yes, people actually do this. So much so, a sister had an entire movement around it so people could randomly
come up and touch her hair,. I know as you begin to explore other races, you may have some questions. That is
perfectly normal and should be welcomed if true racial healing is to begin, but just know, black people don't like you
touching their hair or really their person at all.
Don't refer to other races using animal terms
Referring to other races using terms that describe them as "non human" is offensive. Describing a "person of color"
or anyone for that matter as "The Hulk" or guerrilla are all unnecessary and shows a lack of vocabulary and word
usage on your part. Unless you are referring to someone walking like a gazelle of course, then who could be
offended at that. The new term "beast" has cropped up in recent years, which gets a slide as long as the person
doesn't actually look like a "beast."
appears after thousands of marches, sensitivity trainings and diversity initiatives, America still has a race problem.
Whether perceived or not, the fact that people are lying down in the middle of street speaks to how true diversity is
viewed in our country. No matter what your race, treating others with kindness doesn't require you be born to a
certain culture, just that you be born human. With help and a few simple do's and don't, you can learn to let your
humanity shine around race issues.
Racial etiquette is a set of rules I have observed over the years that I feel should be recognized as we continue to
grow into a diverse nation. Check them out below and try to put them into practice.
Race Etiquette...The Do's and Don'ts
Saying you have a friend of any other culture is offensive
The "proverbial racist" who tries to explain he's not racist because he has "a black friend" is never cool. If you have
to explain you're not racist, you're probably being racially insensitive and maybe borderline racist. Don't refer to
your one "black," friend to prove a point. Simply let your life speak for how you truly feel about those of different
races. Sad things is, in a recent article in NY Magazine, statistics revealed 75% of whites can't even use the "black
friend" defense because frankly, they don't have any black friends.
The "N" word is never appropriate for other races to use
There has never been a more controversial word in the human language than the "N" word. It's deep rooted history
of hate and violence is the reason African Americans hate it when other races use it. There is great debate among
other cultures about using the word like African Americans do, as a term of endearment. I can only liken it to when
growing up with siblings. As a big brother or sister, you can knock the snot out of your sibling, but no one else
better not even think about it. So if polled, approximately 99.9 percent of African Americans if they were honest
would agree, they are offended when other races use the term. Key rule of etiquette is stay away from the "N" word.
Don't use the term "colored" to describe black people
When referring to black people, don't use the word "colored." I know some people may say they are confused
because blacks have gone through a few name changes, but one thing is clear..."colored" is not nor will ever be
acceptable. Now, "people of color" is different. In MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech in 1963, he referred to the
people as, "citizens of color." So with that in mind, when you are referring to a group of people who are of different
races as "people of color," you are using a universal term which is non-offensive. The "ed" in "colored" is what sets
it apart.
Don't use derogatory terms to describe other races of people
Using words like "cracker" and "wet back" are offensive. If you call someone these things, you can expect to be
regarded as a racist. People of all colors use these words, but they are hurtful, offensive and inappropriate. When
describing someone of another race, try start with their name. If you don't know their name, try describing how
you know them like, "my neighbor," or "the dance coach." Begin to re-condition yourself for seeing people for who
they are and not for the color of their skin.
Don't make an assumption based on someone's color
No one wants to be judged by the mistakes of their entire race. If so, everyone would have some explaining to
do.Learn to treat people based on who they are and not what color they are. You can't assume how someone is or
will treat you just based on characters you see on television or read about in the news. Bad people come in all
shapes, sizes and races.
Don't try to fit in to someone's culture by referring to music or language
One day I was in an elevator with two older white distinguished-looking gentlemen. After a few moments of awkward
silence, one turned to me and said, "I like rap music." I didn't ask him if he liked rap, so I can only guess maybe
that's all he knew about black people. For the record, shout out to DRAKE. But, that's not the point. I'm a
grandmother, an author and an American citizen, couldn't we have come together around something other than
"Flava Flav?" Bringing up rap music and trying to talk Spanish when you really can't is very offensive to other
cultures. Just stick to the weather and the playoffs and you should be okay.
Don't ask other races to touch their hair
Yes, people actually do this. So much so, a sister had an entire movement around it so people could randomly
come up and touch her hair,. I know as you begin to explore other races, you may have some questions. That is
perfectly normal and should be welcomed if true racial healing is to begin, but just know, black people don't like you
touching their hair or really their person at all.
Don't refer to other races using animal terms
Referring to other races using terms that describe them as "non human" is offensive. Describing a "person of color"
or anyone for that matter as "The Hulk" or guerrilla are all unnecessary and shows a lack of vocabulary and word
usage on your part. Unless you are referring to someone walking like a gazelle of course, then who could be
offended at that. The new term "beast" has cropped up in recent years, which gets a slide as long as the person
doesn't actually look like a "beast."
| (c) 2015 - 2016. Trenette Wilson. All rights reserved. Disclaimer: The UrbanGirlz website is designed for information and entertainment purposes. If you are in need of assistance contact a local medical professional. |
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Are you practicing race etiquette?
WHAT ARE THE RULES?
Are you practicing race etiquette?
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